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Sep 29, 1999

About My Personal Life

After high school I traveled the globe in search of a basketball team that needed a short, slow chubby white guy who couldn't jump. Unbelievable as it may seem-there were no takers. So I did the next best thing...I toured the country in an alcohol induced haze wondering exactly what had become of my beloved 1976 Nova. Searching low and high to no avail, I awoke one morniing and realized I needed to answer my true calling. Since then I have secretly been building an armed cache in the hopes of assembling my own army and fortress. I someday hope to rule the Western Hemisphere and rather than have the Statue of Liberty as a symbol of freedom, I plan to erect a similar sized statue of her sister...The Black Angel! She will represent the evil within us all and hopefully will allow me enough fame and power that I can be on the Letterman Show! (please feel free to email me at My Email)