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Oct 03, 1999

About My Personal Life

After graduating from high school I went to the University of Michigan to persue an engineering degree. After two years I dumped it and got engaged to the armed services. I served for a couple years in Guam and Okinawa, got the Medal of Honor for shooting a couple communist Buddists and the clap from a nice little Okinawan girl. During the past year I spent the majority of my time campaigning for George Bush. Since I have a nice medal, I am enjoying an appointment as an assistant to Colin Powell in the Bush cabinet. I hope to be able to use this powerful position to launch a national war against the fascism of the green liberals and the baby killers!